Movie Yes, Davidson No

Last night in Dreamland, I had a terrific time with my cousin Patti. We went to a really small movie theatre--the screen was no bigger than our television at home, but the movie was good, the snacks were tasty, and the seating was....eclectic.

After the movie, we met Karen at a restaurant with outdoor seating. We were seated near the curb, and the streets were packed. Evidently, a beloved priest had died and was lying "in state" in the middle of the street; his funeral was going to take place any minute, and we were right in the middle of it all. Karen was wearing her favorite "Davidson" sweatshirt (I didn't know she was a Wildcats fan, but anything is possible in Dreamland!), which was apparently the worst thing to wear as bystander to a priest's funeral. Some guy came up to our table, and shouted, "I can't believe you're wearing a Davidson anything here! It's a disgraceful slap in the face to our dead priest over there!! Shame on you!!!"
We were stunned.
And then I woke up.
Puzzled.

Holy Moley Holey!

First, the good Dreamland event:  Kamala Harris came to John's house, and Linda P. and I were there--don't know where the rest of all y'all were, but you missed an awesome event.
But, as so often happens in Dreamland, there was a weirder event to follow a mostly "normal" one. This involved a giant gopher, not quite as big as the one to the left, but one that had some real boring skills--the holes left by this destructive rodent were perfectly round.
And that would have been amazing to watch, if the holes being made were not IN OUR HOUSE!!
I first noticed the cats acting strangely on the porch, anxiously watching a spot in the concrete. Before long, a perfect circle formed, and the gopher's head pushed up, leaving concrete and a whole lot of dirt in its' wake. The cats were no match for the animal and its' large teeth, but it was flustered enough to disappear. Moments later, another perfect circle in the concrete and another mound of dirt. I hoped beyond hope that it would disappear forever this time, and ran to get Karen to help me watch. When we came back, the worst had happened--the horrible thing had made a hole in the hardwood floor and was taking a nap on the sofa in front of the fireplace!!! (Wait! Fireplace?? I like this Dreamland house better!!!) I screamed obscenities, and it skedaddled back down the hole.
I watched in horror as floorboards moved as the burrowing started again.

If you are faint of heart, stop reading now.

I told Karen to get me a hammer. [Honestly, first, I asked for a bottle, but realized it's head would be way too hard for that to do much damage]. Another hole in the hardwood floor, and then...yes...I "done her in."
Stupid gopher.

Relaxing Weekend?

Last night in Dreamland, Kila, Marci, Peter, and I decided to rent a beach house for a relaxing weekend. We arrived to find a house that was jam-packed with stuff (bric-a-brac), but with a stunning view of the ocean, right on the beach. We had a great weekend. Until Sunday.

Sunday morning, we were relaxing before we had to pack and leave, when a man and a woman entered the house through the kitchen. We assumed, rightly so, that these were the owners. They looked surprised to see us still there, which annoyed me because we had until noon to leave! They grabbed some scuba gear, and left without much said to us. We packed, then decided to have breakfast at the local pub before getting our stuff out of the house and leaving.

We had a great breakfast, but overheard a few guys talking in the next booth. Turns out our "hosts" had a reason for grabbing that scuba gear--they were going to rob a bank of $30 million by entering the vault through an underwater tunnel!!

When we got back to the house, the robbery must have already taken place, because the house was packed! All of the "gang" were buff and mean-looking, including the men! We nonchalantly got our stuff, and my sister started "straightening up"--I guess she was worried about losing our security deposit?! I grabbed her arm and pulled her out the door.

We didn't seem to arouse suspicion, not even when we left in Marci's multi-level Partridge Family-esque bus!

Thank goodness I woke up. I didn't want to go to prison...again...not like two nights ago! But that's another story.